In the sixth month, God created Angry Gay Pope, and He released AGP to do his bidding to take down Satan's cult of Scientology.  Like Adam himself who eateth of the forbidden apple, AGP forgot the instructions of God and enturbulated in the entryways of the cult's tents and enturbulated directly the Satanic bodies of the minions of the cult and of their damned souls. AGP, like Adam himself who eateth of the forbidden apple, partook unto himself the drunken joy of debasing the cult's tents and the cult's minions, forgetting that God commanded AGP to de_base_ only the cult's teachings, and that from a distance greater than an arrow's flight. Now Satan, knowing of AGP's violation of God's commandments, set underway of his own volition his evil Archangel Moxon to reduce the sinning AGP into rubble unto the end of time itself, but only in such a way as to show the power of Satan at Moxon's hands to the vastness of Anonymous and to its army. ... In the ninth month, God commanded the London Guitar Troupe to enturbulate the Satanic cult tents on the plain of Tottenham Court Road with calm celestial music such that the minions of the Satanic Scientology cult would be led back as sheep into the fold of God's minions. Yet, like AGP before them, the LGT became drunk unto themselves with their powers of enturbulation and invaded the tents of the cult on the Plain of TCR with their celestial music, remaining even under the commmandments of Satan's spawn to depart, immediately, begone, and do not return! God was not amused. Nay, God was not amused and causeth his Archangel Michael to place in the mind of the City of London Police to challenge the London Guitar Troupe on the Plain of London; whence the LGT, fearing the wrath of God, hovered in the deep shadows lest the Archangel Michael cast his eyes unto their souls which lay in sin and cause the Archangel Michael to leave LGT, and their errant souls, to the demon Satan and his spawn, the evil Archangel Moxon so that he might reduceth their bodies and souls to rubble. ... Now, God, in the ninth month, sent unto Anonymous the Final Holy commandments that shall never be violated, lest the sinner be delivered unto Moxon, Satan's representative to Teegeak, such that Moxon reduceth the violator, and the violator's soul, to rubble. God Sayeth: 1. All of my holy army of Anonymous must follow the practice of my beloved Son Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi.  Protest shall be peaceful lest Satan's spawn Moxon wages war on Anonymous. 2. All of my holy army of Anonymous must follow the practice of my beloved Son Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi.  Protest shall be farther than an arrow's flight from the tents of Satan's minion Scientology lest Satan's spawn Moxon wages war on Anonymous for his amusement. 3. All of my holy army of Anonymous must follow the practice of my beloved Son Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi.  Protest shall be against the practices of Satan's evil of Scientology, and not against the persons of Scientologists lest Satan's spawn Moxon wages war on Anonymous for his amusement. 4. All of my holy army of Anonymous must follow the practice of my beloved Son Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi.  Protest shall never violate the tents of the evil Scientologists, lest Satan's spawn Moxon wages war on Anonymous for his amusement. 5. All of my holy army of Anonymous must follow the practice of my beloved Son Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi. I have anointed the beloved thirty-ninth nephew, sixteen times six times removed, of the Angel Michael, Jeffrey Jacobsen, arbiter for all time of the practice of my beloved Son Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi. Anonymous shall listen intently to my arbiter's word, lest they be delivered unto Satan's spawn Moxon for his amusement. 6. Lest ye of Anonymous follow my commands, I will wash my hands of Anonymous unto Satan; when Satan's spawn Moxon has finished his Satanic tortures and reduction into rubble of the bodies of Anonymous and of their souls, Satan will boil the souls of Anonymous in vats of excrement unto the ending of Time itself. G